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Archive for May, 2011
Bad company corrupts good morals (Part 4 of 8)
Wednesday, May 25th, 2011
I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase, “bad company corrupts good morals”. Well, the same is true with encouragement. When we surround ourselves with people who are continually discouraging we can quickly find ourselves equally discouraged. We need to look for people who are encouraging. The word “en”courage actually mean what it says. Encourage literally mean “to put courage into.” Do you have people in your life that put courage into you? Here’s what you look for:
They believe in you.
They expect great things from you.
They are there for you when you fail.
They are there to cheer you on when you succeed.
They feed your relationship with encouraging words and actions.
They are not expecting to get anything from your friendship.
Let me show you what I mean. Here’s a summary of our last Children’s staff retreat:
Five non-related people living together in a home for three days. Some people call it “Big Brother,” others call it “The Real World”… we call it “STAFF RETREAT”. Phrases like, “you’re a cheater” and “I don’t really care what you think” blur the lines moment by moment. Seriously, every year we get away for a quick retreat that I call a “Leadership Advance.” I call it this because I believe it is a strategic retreat, for he purpose of “team advancement.”
So, I was going to list a few things as to why I think retreats are important, but instead I’ve decided to let my team do the talking. Here are their thoughts:
Question: What’s the value of a Staff Retreat?
Mary Ann Allison (Studio 6.7 Ministry Coordinator)
- “It is only after spending times like this that I fully appreciate “Shanna” – her resourcefulness, their strength as a single young gal.”
- “Downtime is just as valuable as our planning times.”
- “We’re very focused.”
Liz McKenna (Studio 6.7 Administrative Assistant)
- “Janice amazes me, her energy…her ability to adapt and learn.”
- “We’re on the same page.”
Janice DeCarlo (Studio 6.7 Elementary Director)
- “If your communication is good, you discover that many of your “issues” are not “issues”, their just differences.”
- “Our planning time is more focused…and it’s a time of laughter and looking forward.”
- This helps us grow in friendship… we like each other.”
Shanna Banks (Studio 6.7 Early Childhood Director)
- “What’s the value? …”What?” “I’m not awake yet!” – “I take that back… I’ve been set up.”
We sit at the dinning room table. We share our meals, we eat…we talk…a lot! Something happens we you are in close community with your team. Every year we do this, I watch my team mesh and work out differences that have been building over the previous few months. How about your team?
Can you hear the encouragement in the air? It’s there. A little sarcastic at times, but it’s there.
Ask yourself, “With whom am I surrounding myself?”
“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up…
- I Thessalonians 5:11
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Investing (Part 3 of 8)
Monday, May 23rd, 2011
Another action that will help you “keep going on” when you’re ready to quit is the act of mentoring. A couple years ago I heard my mother-in-law put it like this way;
“Everyone needs to be reaching up and reaching down”.
I’m not sure where she got that phrasing from, but it paints the perfect picture. Can’t you see a guy or gal reaching up towards the hand of someone a little further along and at the same time reaching down towards the and of another a little further back.
I’ve learned it a little differently. I’ve always been told that I needed a “Timothy” and a “Barnabas” in my life.
Who do you have in your life that is actively mentoring you?
Likewise; who are you actively mentoring?
Do you have these two people?
#1 Get a mentor – Everyone needs someone in his or her life that’s a little further down the road, whether it’s in parenting, teaching, or learning a new hobby.
Find someone… ask them. I they can’t do it. Find someone else.
#2 Be a mentor – Everyone needs someone in his or her life that’s a little further behind him or her. Every day you are learning lessons that someone else needs to see.
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Passionate (Part 2-8)
Friday, May 20th, 2011
As a Christian counselor, I have the privilege, responsibility, or burden, (the feeling changed from day to day) to meet with couples that are experiencing trouble in their marriage. Sometimes there has been an infidelity. Other times it’s just that life circumstances such as an illness or a job loss has created some significant strain in the relationship. Either way, one thing that is consistent in these marriages is the fact the passion is gone. Relationships are kind of funny like that. When the passion and excitement fall off for one reason of another so does our attention to details. We forget to see the little joys and the small victories. In short, we forget to remember the reason we started this relationship in the first place. The further down this road a person goes the harder it is for them to even see the possibility of re-igniting the fire again.
CONFESSION: I’ve been down this road before. Thankfully, I can say that it was not in my marriage. It was in my passion and calling by Christ. I have spent many mornings waking up passionless, as I get ready for work. I slip into my office and close the door and begin to work and simply count down the hours until I can head home. Day after day, week after week, I allowed the passion to slowly die. Again, luckily I didn’t stay there. Instead I surrounded myself with passionate people and slowly they helped me walk out of the murk and reignite the passion again. Two things I found to be so inspiring in the people who led me out of my passionless state was that they possessed a courageous heart and a passionate soul.
A courageous heart:
Joshua 1:9 “Be strong and of good courage…”
1) These people courageously led fully committed to the cause. They believed in what they were doing!
2) These people also possess personal character and identity. They are able to separate what they DO and who they ARE.
3) These people live for an audience of one.
Galatians 1:10 (NLT) “Obviously, I’m not trying to be a people pleaser! No, I am tying to please God. If I were still trying to please people, I would not be Christ’s servant.”
A passionate soul:
1) Passionate people can make the difference.
50% of all CEO’s of fortune 500 Co.’s had a C average in school
65% of all U.S. Senators came from the bottom ½ of their class
75% of all Presidents came from the bottom ½ of their class
50%+ of millionaire entrepreneurs never finished college
J. Madden “Difference in Pro Bowl players & the rest is enthusiasm”
2) Passion is contagious. When we forget the ultimate we’re are driven by the immediate. The immediate wears us down and keeps us busy. It’s our job to remain calm in the storm during the craziness of the week to week.
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Staying in the Race…(Part 1-8)
Wednesday, May 18th, 2011
If you remember last week I mentioned a few of the “Distractions” in my life right now. One of these distractions is a two-part project I’m working on with Craig Jutila called Year Won and Year Two.
This is one of the most exciting projects I’ve worked on yet. Here’s the basic idea: Between Craig and I, we have almost 40 years of ministry experience. (ok, we’re not as old as that sounds… or at least I’m not, but when you add it up… that’s where we sit) These workbooks will lay out 12 areas of ministry that we see as being crucial to “winning” your first couple years of ministry.
We’re not saying that this is THE ONLY WAY to do ministry, but it the way WE do it.
Over the next couple weeks, I’m posting a few of the discussions from these up-coming resources. Hope Enjoy!
“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race,
I have kept the faith.”
- 2 Timothy 4:7 (NIV)
Keep learning
I have got two of the greatest parents around. No, really. They have been amazing examples to follow. You see, they have raised four children that are all in full-time vocational ministry. Although I don’t believe that everyone out there needs to be a pastor or a missionary, I do know that my parents did something right. They raised four children to love the Lord with all their hearts.
One of the things that I love the most about my dad and mom is the fact that they are always learning. Here’s just one example. Years ago, back when the whole Harry Potter books were first being burned, my parents did something that few fifty-year-olds did, they picked up a copy and read it. Now why in the world did they feel the need to read this material? It wasn’t because they have a thing for wizards or because they had hours of free too to fill. They’d tell you right away that they read the books because they had grandchildren, grandchildren who we asking their parents if they could read the books. They read it because they wanted to know what was in these books, what was the big draw, and why are these making such a big fuss. They didn’t read them because they were tempted or nosey. They read them because they wanted to be discerning when discussing them. They’ve read numerous books, view many movies, and even played a few video games, all for the sake of their grandchildren. One thing my parents have taught me is to be a lifelong learner. As Jim Collins says in his book Good to Great ,“all leaders are learners”.
Every year I have a garden. I love my garden. It’s become a bit of an obsession with me to be honest. I’m addicted to gardening. Every spring I grab my gloves and head out to me garden and begin to turn over the soil. I add fertilizer, compost, and even a little new dirt, just to keep it fresh. Then I plant. A few tiny plants are added into the ground, several hundred seeds are sown. When the day is done I can stand there looking at the beautiful garden, mostly dirt, a few seedlings, but beautiful nonetheless. It’s beautiful because of all the hard work I put into it. Here’s the best part. After a week or so, more seedlings pop up. The plants begin to grow. After a month, it starts to actually look like a garden. After a few more weeks, the fruit is produced. Tomatoes, squash, peppers… they’re all there. My wife laughs at me though because I like to take pictures every step of the way. I find it interesting how year after year the garden changes from the year before. One year my tomatoes are good, the next year it’s the peppers that are the healthiest. One thing that I’ve found to be true every year though is that once the plant stops growing, it isn’t long before it dies. With most plants, if it’s not growing it’s not healthy. I’m not sure why plants can’t just stay the same, but that’s just how it works. I kind of believe the same thing with leaders. If you stop growing and settle in to just maintaining… the end is near.
Here are 10 ways to keep learning and growing as a leader:
1. Be sure to always have a book.
2. Hang around smart people.
3. Do something you’re learning.
4. Teach others what you’re learning
5. Be a part of a group.
6. Unlearn some of your assumptions
7. Find jobs that push you to learn.
8. Start a project.
9. Set aside time to learn
10. Make it a priority to learn.
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