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Archive for June 2nd, 2010
What happens when “what’s good for the church” ISN’T “what’s good for you”?
Wednesday, June 2nd, 2010
Have you ever been in a place where it feels like you give and give and yet never see the fruits of your labor…oh yea, I forgot you work in a church so of coarse you have. After being in ministry for over 13 years, I have learned a few things about the pace of the church vs. the pace of the ministers. Lesson #1 – Generally, their not the same. Lesson #2 – I’ve learned that it’s not long before there is a conflict over what is viewed as being “best for the church” and what you feel is “best for your family’s health and well being.” I have found that there is at least 3 compromises that have taken place when “what’s best for the church” is NOT “what’s best for your family.”
Example: When “what’s best for you church” is to:
1. Work more hours (it’s ok…it’s only a busy season of ministry. Guess what? I’ve had 13 years of such seasons… they don’t end. Ministry IS a season!)
2. Be available on your day off.(“as a pastor, you need to be accessible.” Ok, there is a reality to needing to know if a church member is dying… however, when a minister has to be always “on” … he/she slowly turns “off” emotionally. You need to have time to recover. Even Jesus didn’t attempt to be “on” all the time.)
I’m sure you have your own examples…
Here’s 3 compromises that are made when you choose the churches agenda…
You’ve compromised your FAMILY – every decision you make IS reflective of a priority list in your life. When the church outweighs the family time and time again… you’ve prioritized it ABOVE your family.
You’ve compromised your MINISTY – It’s generally at this point that you begin to call the families of your church to live a more balanced life that you are. You’re asking them to prioritize God, Family, Work, etc. You’re leading by what you SAY and not what you DO. –not a good place to be!
You’ve compromised your RELATIONSHIP – It isn’t long into this process that you begin to resent the church… it’s leaders… and even the people you serve. This is the beginning of burnout. Again… not a good place to be!
…Next post: 3 sacrifices you need to make for the church
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